OVERBOARD

right now I'm am tryng everything not to explode. Idk what I am going to do. I need to run fast away. I am having way too many breakdowns and I can handle them. Idk what to do. As I sit here I am trying not to cry and start shaking into a ball. I am literally shutting down. All my depression symptoms have come back. I'm having severe attacks. I don't feel like doing anything. I can't do anything at all. and i' not sure what to do about it. Plus I just got informed that my bank account is negative. So ot sure how to handle that cause I won't get paid till next week.

So I'm trying really hard to to jump off the building right now. And I'm not sure what to do.

Run Away

Well here I am at 4 in the morning. I can't sleep, I have a serious migrane, and mostly I feel like my life is falling apart. I'm not sure what to do. I need an entire week off from school. I wanna be away from everything and just hide out with my family here in bargersville. I'm going to talk myself into gong to history, I've missed that class enough. .But I really don't wana go home. I lkie being her. I don't eat as much which means hopefully I'll finally loose wight. I have tons of things to do, yet I don't do them. I am realizing I do way way better on a laptop. So i need to get mine fixed. Desperatly. I think that would help me a lot. I really should sleep cause I'm tired. But now I've got myself worked up. Ugh...so so much hw. And I need a job. I jsut wanna crawl into a lil dark hole and stay there. I don't wanna die...no I'm over that...just a hibernation would be nice. And I rele wanna stay here in bargersville. I feel loved here...I think.